She hides beneath the same golden yellow Orlando, Florida sweatshirt. Every time I see her she comes in, hair flying around as if she were just in a convertible; her gray hairs saluting me and bowing to the good deed she is about to practice. The sweatshirt has taken on a life of a lover, it coaxes her, reads to her, marinades her in her sorrow. Does it comfort her body in the night while she sleeps? Does she grab it when she returns from work and rub it on her skin like it has been calling her; offering her a new life. She lives in it like it is a home. She has not taken it off in years-- her shield. It is the size of a tent--she hides her body in it. I wonder if she were to cry if I stole it for the night? Does she have a name for it? The yellow wasp, the golden wheat, Rex Butler.
Her shoes are ragged and rough. They are like aching soldiers begging to be buried and claimed dead. What once were solid white lovers, are now decrepit antiques. They most smell when she takes them off and throws them into her closet, her garage, her car. Does she love the smell of her own foot fungus? Does it comfort it?
Her pants are black spandex. They are too big for her; just as the sweatshirt is.
You can barely see her legs move underneath the over-stretched over-sized spandex. She hides; the Golden Wheat, yellow wasp comes 3/4 down her thighs; she hides.
I watch her every week training in the same clothes. I see her aching in her loneliness like a rotting peach. Does her yellow sweatshirt touch her skin enough? I watch her move and laugh in her tent as if no one is watching, as if she is not carrying her home with her. I want to touch her and burn the sweatshirt.
Nuisance Tripping
9 months ago
2 comments:
ohhh, Jennifer - so much to play with here! All I have to contribute are tangents, really - if any of them seem usable or fun, run with 'em...I know I will.
-the sexuality of dress:
I don't mean just fetishes here, or the common tactic of dressing to sexually impress. But if you stop to think about it, we're awfully intimate with our clothes - we have to be.
Unless you like tarps, chances are some very personal parts of yours are being held right now by clothing. And do we think much of these items that touch us more then our lovers? These things we take care of (laundry, folding, storing) and choose carefully, sometimes spend too much money on...or not enough? What does its say? Very interesting area for exploration!
-wasp symbolism/fruit symbolism:
wasps, according to wikipedia (all hail push-button factoids!) are part of the arthropod phylum...critters with hard shells/exoskeletons that have to be shed every so often before they can grow. this lady here has an "exoskeleton", this outfit she's so attached to which is almost meat enough for a more developed piece. i see a lot of hiding, nesting "her home", "her tent" and less of the "visciousness" associated with wasps.
also, rotting fruit - the peach - ripeness taken to its logical conclusion. too much beauty, fecundity, whatever, if left unused really does deteriorate. this woman seems to be deteriorating but possibly OK with it (??) everything does have a cycle, so maybe she's ok with hiding her body, wearing the same things all the time, not worrying about her outside look. or maybe it's indicative of a problem? see - this is what i mean by so much to play with! :)
-the value of effluvia:
the body is so often corrected for one reason or another we have no idea what we smell like. there's a value in stink, in natural byproducts of activity. however, since she's wearing the same shoes over and over it signals a lack of attention or concern with bio-cues. that'd be awesome to write into, in this or another piece. shoes are hard to clean, hard to "correct" in the same way we can deodorize our underwear or tee shirts or whatever - they're more reliable witnesses to your activities, your environment...feet and shoes can betray you!
I can see now that I've moved into the realm of the weird.
(from class)
ok - she goes to the gym, but she doesn't "look" like it...that makes her unique - I'd go into that - what is the variable here?
She doesn't seem to be performing that "body beautiful" thing - why?
also - i'd write into her lonliness - its obvious that she's not OK with her solitude...oh, hell i don't know - maybe a larger character sketch would allow for more play room?
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