Blog #15 In the Open:Empty

All of the places I have formed a connection to in my life are in nature. Some of the other places are family vacation homes or areas. These natural places are special to me because they are an escape from the suburban hubbub that I was forced to live in.

The most important place has been the Watchung Reservation, which is five minutes from my house. I have been visiting it since I was 14, watching the seasons change on my favorite trees. It has been a place for me to express my emotions, release tension, get some exercise, meditate, be with a loved one, and be creative. It is my sacred place.

When I am here no one is there scrutinizing my every move. No one is telling me I need to dress better or act more lady like. I roll around in the dirt there. I talk to the trees and I don't give a hell if anyone stares. It is just nature and me. The same massive rock that always lets me sit on it and write and cry. The same tree that dips into the water and touches the reflection like siamese twins.

I need this place sometimes like I need my mother. It is my solace. I went here one night after a breakup with my long term boyfriend and walked in a blustery fall storm. I cried on the dark trails and wished for the rains and trees to help me disappear. I was not afraid.